It’s helpful to know the difference between hunger and a craving.

Hunger comes on gradually. Our stomach starts to growl, we feel a tad lightheaded or we just feel empty without much energy.

Emotional/mindless/habitual hunger comes on suddenly. Out of nowhere, we’re in the mood for something. If we really paid attention to our stomach we’d realize we weren’t physically hungry.

Then there’s mouth cravings. Mouth cravings can happen whether we’re physically or emotionally hungry. It’s when our mouth or tongue is craving something sweet or fatty or salty.

If we really pay attention to our body and mind we’d realize mouth cravings are really only in our mouth. They aren’t driven by our mind saying ‘comfort me’ or ‘help me escape reality for a few minutes.’

Mouth cravings typically occur after we eat certain foods. And the fix is easy.

For example, whenever I eat Italian food with some sort of marinara sauce I crave chocolate. And it’s really not emotionally driven. My mouth just feels like it wants something sweet.

So instead of giving in, I (try to!) have some grapes or an orange or better yet as soon as I’m done eating I floss, brush my teeth and use mouth wash.

I’m literally scraping the craving off my tongue. It works every time.

The challenging part is that so many of us enjoy the 5 minute escape of eating whatever it is we want. We don’t want to get in the habit of brushing our teeth even though we know it’ll work!

I’ve seen this time after time.

Clients are afraid to let go of their temporary escape so they purposely don’t brush their teeth.

It seems harder to just brush our teeth than to give in to our cravings. It’s like taking a bottle away from a baby. But as babies eventually grow out of using bottles – so can we.

We just need to try it. Try brushing your teeth immediately after a meal and you’ll be amazed at how quickly you forget about the craving.

If you never give yourself an opportunity to figure out what it is you really want, you’ll always resort to eating junk. And eating junk, unfortunately, has never made us feel more awesome than eating healthfully has.

Try snacking on some grapes or an orange – it will fix your cravings. Even better: try coming up with a nightly activity that’ll be soothing so you don’t have to give in to your mouth cravings at all.

I hope you had a wonderful weekend!

I’ve long argued that you can tell a lot about a person by how much they tip.

I’ve long believed that having personal integrity is one of the keys to being truly happy. It’s the only way to live because it’s our sense of selves.

In short: Personal integrity is doing the right thing even when no one is looking.

I believe lying to yourself – and rationalizing things to yourself – that you normally wouldn’t do if other people were around – is the worst feeling in the entire world.

There is no worse feeling than lying to yourself. We all do it day in and day out. And it’s very easy to become numb to the feeling.

I don’t know one person who enjoys being overweight and out of shape.

I don’t know one person who doesn’t enjoy being healthy and in shape.

Clearly, there’s something going on here. If everyone wants to be healthy and in shape why isn’t everyone just that?

Because we constantly lie to ourselves.

Don’t feel bad. We all do it! (That’s why I started MBT because I was doing it and I hated how it made me feel.)

The difference between us and everyone else is we’re more honest with ourselves. We’re willing to raise our hands and say, “Hey, I need some help!”

The only way to solve a problem is to acknowledge you have one in the first place. Most people can’t do that. And even fewer people can admit they need some help.

That’s why so few people are ultra successful. Every mega-successful person I’ve ever met is extremely self-aware in what they excel at, and what they’re terrible at. The difference – they aren’t too proud to raise their hand and say, “Hey, I need some help!”

Here’s another key to happiness: when there is a disconnect between our desires and our actions, unhappiness ensues.

So that means if something is really important to you, say, losing weight but your actions don’t reflect that (most likely, because you’re rationalizing and justifying to yourself) that’s going to lead to unhappy feelings.

It’s a constant journey of listening to the Body Tutor on your shoulder versus the devil on your other.

No one knows how much you’re concentrating when you’re lifting weights. So you can easily go through the motions or you can go slow and steady and focus on the muscle you’re working each and every rep.

No one knows if you’re running as hard as you can. It’s very easy to fake it. Only you know how hard you’re running.

No one knows if you’re sneaking snacks when no one is looking. Sure. You don’t have to tell us…

But at the end of the day you have to face two mirrors. The mirror you look in every night when you brush your teeth and the mirror of the Daily Feedback.

If you don’t like what you see, start with personal integrity. You’ll be amazed at how you feel (and look) when you start doing the things you really want to do deep down.

In fact, I’m arguing that personal integrity is the key to your happiness. People who get plastic surgery are still, according to plenty of research, unhappy with how they look – and feel.

Inside out. That’s what it’s about. Doing what you *really* want to do. Being who you *really* want to be.

You ever hear of the game Spotto? It’s a game that involves finding red cars (or whatever you want) and shouting the appropriate term as you see them.

What you discover after just a few minutes is how many red cars there are. A heck of a lot!

We notice what we choose to notice.

Consider playing a version of spotto involving delicious, and healthy foods or ways where you can move more (steps instead of elevators, parking far from the store as opposed to close, etc.).

What you’ll notice is that there’s a lot more of it out there than you would have guessed, which will make it easier for you to follow suit.

Spotto!

Stop focusing on what you don’t have. Focus on what you do have. Stop focusing on what you can’t eat. Focus on what you can eat!

For today. For this coming weekend. And for life!

I hope you had a wonderful, fun and healthy weekend! And if it wasn’t so healthy, that’s what today is for.

Question: Does confusion mess you up?

I think we can all agree that stress makes us eat. Or grief. Or celebration. But what about when we feel all wound up but we just don’t know what exactly is bothering us except that we feel a little crazy?

The laundry is piled to the ceiling, your co-worker is not being nice, your kids are being unappreciative and fresh, your boss is being a jerk, your boyfriend/girlfriend/husband/wife is giving you the cold shoulder, your friend let you down, the computer broke again…

And you just want to escape! For many of us, when we feel these emotions, food feels like the perfect escape. It’s an easy way out.

Or is it?

The problem with emotionally eating is that when you’re done eating, the problems and feelings will still be there!

The key is to slow down and identify the real problem. It’s very tempting to resort to a ‘food coma’ or ‘food trance’ but that’s not going to make anything better in the long run.

Instead, slow down. Look. Listen and feel.

Instead of eating how about:

Thinking things through…
Talking to a friend…
Meditating…
Writing…
Waiting before acting…
Going for a walk…
Thinking of 3 things you can do to make the problem better…

The problem with resorting to food is that you’ll never understand what you’re really feeling.

Food gives us a momentary escape – instant gratification – but we must remember that although it might make things seem better in the very short term, the problem will keep coming up again and again.

It’s like the annoying neighbor who won’t stop knocking until you answer the door. Eventually, you just gotta answer the door!

Be aware of what you’re really feeling and answer the door this week!

Your to do: When you hear the ‘knock, knock’ ask, ‘Who’s there?!’ don’t just drown it out.