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The disease that makes us overeat and overweight. Part 2. (Click here to read part 1.)
Let's get right into it...
Ever notice how in movies like “This is 40” or “Knocked Up” or one of my favorites, “American Beauty” – the common theme is the main character feels like a loser? He's always out of shape and can’t believe where he is in life.
Ever notice how there's always one scene (if not dozens) about how out of shape they are? It's either them buying healthy food for the first time and having no idea what to buy, looking in the mirror and hating what they see, being attracted to someone they think is out of their league, trying to cut out junk food, or exercising.
Here is one of the most powerful scenes from American Beauty. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AVpsmoAe9pM (Probably not safe for work)
There have been so many of these movies about what is essentially, a quarter or mid-life crisis, disguised as a comedy.
Where do these “crises” come from?
I've done some reading on quarter-life and mid-life crisis. Really interesting stuff.
These crisis come from:
DISAPPOINTMENT which can lead to regret, a very powerful emotion. (We feel way worse about the opportunities we don’t take versus the opportunities we do.)
In all those movies the main character feels disappointed with how their life is turning out. They can't believe "this is it". They can’t believe how out of shape they are. They can’t believe who they’ve become. They can't believe how little control over they have of their life.
We don’t live in Hollywood though.
I’ve noticed it in real life too, with men and women.
So many people tell me they “let themselves go.”
“Letting ourselves go” and getting engrossed with our life seems par for the course once we're an adult. It's almost like a right of passage.
“I'm busy with work, I’ll focus on my health later on!”
“I'm married now it doesn’t matter. Who am I trying to impress?”
“I have kids now! They take up all of my free time!”
There are endless ways to rationalize, "letting ourselves go."
This is where feelings of unfilled potential, disappointment and emptiness stem from because we stop taking care of ourselves. We feel like we have no control over our lives anymore. How can we...when we feel like we have no control over ourselves!
Instead, we focus on everything else - things we don't have nearly as much control over.
The lack of control is the most interesting part to me because that's the most actionable. I bet you can guess what the remedy for a lack of control is in all of the books I read on quarter and mid-life crisis:
Drum roll please...
Exercising and eating better.
Change - no matter your age - whatever aspect of life it is (career, love social, etc.,) starts with you. The idea is to focus on what you can most control.
Check this. Read the part in the box at the top: https://www.reddit.com/r/AskMen/comments/3iyho9/midlife_crisis_at_35/
This guy writes a long thread about how he's having a midlife crisis at 35 years old.
The interesting thing is this guy knows exactly what he needs to do. He even writes it! "I really need to hit the gym and feel better about myself."
The Solution to overcoming D.O.U.P is:
Realizing your body’s full potential so that you’re able to realize your overall potential. You don't have to change your entire life to change your life.
What I’m saying is that no matter your age, change in whatever aspect of life it is (career, love, social, etc.,) starts with YOU.
Being out of shape, overweight and tired all the time wears on us. It erodes our self-esteem. It spills into every aspect of our life. We don’t trust ourselves to be able to go after what we really want. We lose confidence in ourselves.
In other words, we feel stuck in life. We feel like we have no control.
That leads to so many uncomfortable feelings like disappointment, feeling like a failure, and unfilled potential.
What is the "easiest" way to get rid of these uncomfortable feelings?
Besides overeating, which I talked about in my last email, it is blaming our situation on work, kids, schedule, etc.
It’s much “easier" on the mind to blame our feelings of being stuck on things beyond our control. Otherwise, we have to step up to the plate. That can be scary.
Here's the thing:
Overeating never gives us what we really want. It only suppresses the desire (for a short time) of what we really want.
This is human nature. It’s what we do…because tension relief is what we’re after.
It all starts with ourselves.
There is no better way to exert the control we do have than on our health and fitness.
Change your body = changing your mind = changing your life.
Can it really be so simple? YES!
Here's the tricky part: Your brain is going to convince you it can't be so simple. Why? It's easier to remain stuck!
This is harder than it sounds. Don't fall for it. Catch yourself.
I don’t think it’s a coincidence that so many of our clients have changed careers and went after their dreams. When you take control of what you’re able to – aka yourself – it allows you to handle everything else so much better.
No, I’m not saying that being in great shape is going to suddenly make your life perfect. But it will change how you think about yourself and that can change everything.
For those of you who are very happy with your life…
For many, the ONLY nagging feeling IS this feeling that you let yourself go. That you're not the best physical version of yourself. This can lead to so many uncomfortable feelings as well. You'll see an old picture and shrug, "The Good Old Days!"
Sure, it feels awesome to have a flat stomach and get into those tight pair of jeans and notice yourself looking good – but it’s so much more than that.
Being healthy and fit and taking care of ourselves is a signal to others – and most importantly, ourselves. It’s a commitment we’re making to being the best version of ourselves we can be. That feels awesome! And it certainly feels way better than the alternative. When we're not, it wears on us.
So many clients report feeling so much happier as early as a few weeks in because they’re finally taking action (eating well and exercising, consistently) on something that has been so important to them for a long time (their health and well being) – and are no longer suppressing that desire. (We either realize our desires or we rationalize them away.)
Many clients reach their health and fitness goals and ask, “What’s next? What else can I conquer?” Bingo. That’s the idea.
What I’m suggesting is that before you change anything in your life, change yourself. Focus on what you can most control.
Once we do that, and as we do that, you'll notice how powerful you feel. That power spills over into every aspect of our life.
We're all juggling a million balls. One of those balls is our health and fitness. If we drop that ball, eventually, everything else is going to drop too. Everything impacts everything.
The more we take care of ourselves, the better we're able to take care of everything else. So simple but so incredibly powerful.
We're now in Q4 of 2015. Are you in better shape now than you were at the start of the year?
If so, I love it! I truly want everyone to feel the effects of being healthy and fit - whether it's with MBT or not. This is too important. It's too transformative.
If not, why not try MBT?
I offer a guarantee because I know what I offer works better than anything else out there. I believe in that much. Try my program for a full month. If you don't feel or see results you get your money back. It's as simple as that.
We all know our health and fitness is so important. We all know the transformative potential it has. Yet, we all play the "I'll start fresh on Monday" game over and and over. It's already October 9th! 2016 is going to be here before we know it!
Don't you think if you could "Just eat healthy and exercise consistently" you would have already? Knowing what to do and actually doing it are very, very different. It's amazing how many people say they know what to do yet year after year they're not in the shape they want to be in.
You will never regret being healthier and more fit once and for all. With MBT, it gets easier with time. Most diets get harder with time because they're based solely on willpower and motivation, both of which are fleeting. (Think about how motivated you may have felt at the start of the week compared to today, for example.)
What are you waiting for?
Questions about my program? Message and let me know.
Together, we will make it happen.
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